


Belonging

by incandescentshadows



Category: A Conspiracy Of Truths
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 07:10:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17976740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incandescentshadows/pseuds/incandescentshadows
Summary: I wrote a little piece of fic for Ylfing because he deserves some love and I know Alexandra Rowland is going to break my heart in A Choir of Lies.“Please.” He whispered, but didn’t say the rest.Please go away, please don’t leave, please convince me you’re worth giving up everything I’ve ever wanted because I’m ten seconds from doing it and all you have to do is say the word.





	Belonging

I wrote a little piece of fic for Ylfing because he deserves some love and I know Alexandra Rowland is going to break my heart in A Choir of Lies. 

Ylfing had been hurt one too many times, yet here he was again. Sitting on the stone bench in the courtyard of the family who had taken them in over a week ago Ylfing clenched his fists and reminded his traitorous heart that handsome and kind did not equate to decent and devoted. He’d known many kind and handsome lovers in the past. They never lasted.

Still, rational mind grinding away at all the  _ could be’s _ and  _ what if’s _ , Ylfing’s heart was stuck on dark curls and indecent stares.  Kadri Nadelko was a merchant’s son. An heir to an empire. A risk that Ylfing’s heart just couldn’t take. Because he’d always known that the others would leave, or he would leave them, and it never quite hurt enough to keep him from being with them.

Kadri, though. Kadri was more questions than a single story could handle, and “Have you got enough blankets in here” every night, and just tell me one more time about the desert. He was _you don’t have to talk about_ _Nuryavet_  and _here let me tell you about the time I fell off the pier_ and extra biscuits on the plate without having to ask.

He was  _ it _ , if Ylfing was willing to let him be. If he could put down the years of stories, and travel and the fear that he’d look away from Chant too long and find himself alone again. Kadri was settling down in the olive groves and every care taken and Ylfing couldn’t have it. He couldn’t turn his back on the stories. He’d started this journey with stars in his eyes and a yearning in his heart and that hadn’t gone away despite sleeping on the ground for weeks at a time and fleeing a country that had nearly destroyed everything he was.

So he was sitting here, on this bench, instead of enjoying himself at the party that the Nadelko family were hosting in their honor.

“You’re leaving soon, aren’t you?” Kadri’s voice came from behind him and Yilfing shouldn’t have been surprised. Attentive was one of the five words he would use when he moved on and told others the story of The Merchant’s Mistakes.

“Tomorrow, I think.” Ylfing answered. He sniffed, and told himself it was the cold night air causing his nose to run a little and not the nearly-in-tears heartbreak over this stupid idea that he wasn’t even letting himself consider. “Chant doesn’t like staying in one place for long. Too many places to visit as it is.”

“I thought so.”

“You should be in there.” Ylfing reminded him.  _ Go away, go away. Stop making this so hard. We haven’t so much as kissed and it hurts to say goodbye. Don’t make me say it. _

“I’m exactly where I want to be.” The rustle of clothing as Kadri comes around to sit beside Ylfing on the bench, just this side of too close to be considered friendly. Ylfing’s hands twisted in his lap and he stared down at them, determined not to fall into this trap he knows he won’t pull himself back out of. It’s the first time, the only time, he’s truly considered giving up the job. 

“Please.” He whispered, but didn’t say the rest.  _ Please go away, please don’t leave, please convince me you’re worth giving up everything I’ve ever wanted because I’m ten seconds from doing it and all you have to do is say the word. _

“I love my home.” Kadri said, hands reaching out to stop Ylfing’s fidgeting. He holds them tight and doesn’t say another word until Ylfing looks up and meets his eye. “This is where I learned my mother’s tongue and where I found my father’s approval. This is the place that taught me who I want to be. It isn’t the place I want to be, though. Not anymore.”

“You love it here.” Ylfing objected. Kadri knew everything there was to know about trade, and finance, and wares. He knew the land and the business and the people. He was a feature of this place as much as the acres of olive trees were. “You belong here.”

“I do.” Kadri agreed, and Ylfing furrowed his eyebrows at the other man’s contradiction of himself. Kadri’s thumb rubbed along Ylfing’s hand and he held his gaze. “No matter where you go, or how far you travel, you belong in the place where you are Ylfing. And right beside you is exactly where I belong now too.”  


End file.
